More Answers to Big Business Lunch Questions
A LOT Can Go Wrong at a Business Lunch: Being Prepared Will Help
As I wrote in my last post, I spoke recently for HP in Southern California. I was brought in to speak because my clients appreciate the importance of doing a business lunch the right way. Whether you’ve been on more than 3,000 client lunches (like I have) or you’re just starting out, it is important that you feel comfortable and confident. This can come from knowing what to avoid or how to handle certain situations.
During the meal, I asked the printer resellers and distributors to try to “Stump the Speaker / Shock the Speaker.” I wanted to offer my BEST advice for their WORST situations. I haven’t been stumped yet because most challenges or problems that come up at business lunches are more common than people think, but I definitely heard some great stories and thought-provoking questions.
I asked our guests 1) what was the worst thing that EVER happened to them at a business lunch, 2) how they might have better handled the situation, and 3) to share anything they might have trouble with – in general – along the way.
I found it interesting that most people offered their OWN suggestions as to how they might have better handled a particular situation. I think most of us tend to “hash & rehash” those awful moments in our minds. Seems we’d ALL like “a ticket to ‘shoulda, woulda, coulda.’” My mantra is “be prepared,” but things can happen fast when at a business lunch. If you’re with a big client, you might be nervous. And then, there are just a LOT of things that can go wrong. We’re people – not robots – and we have emotions, as well as million thoughts a day. Hindsight is always 20/20. 
Good judgment – unfortunately – comes from bad experience.
Here are some of the best stories from last week:
Shannon said that a client dumped coffee in his lap. HOT coffee. YIKES! As to what he would do differently? He would not have ordered coffee for the table! THAT was easy! And, I can add this little tip:
IF YOU KNOW that your client likes something you don’t care for – such as alcohol, dessert, or sushi, bring someone from your office as a “buffer.” That way, your client won’t have to drink alone (and YOU of course will be Designated Driver!), YOU won’t have to try to find cooked entrees at a sushi bar, or you won’t have to see your morning workout get annulled by a giant slice of cake you forced down just because your client wanted dessert! Bringing a coworker (or boss) can be a very wise move, especially when you know your client is going to want something you don’t care for.
One executive ended up in a restaurant that was too noisy. We’ve ALL been to restaurants that are USUALLY just fine for a business lunch, but on the day WE are there, there is a baby shower going on at the next table or some other type of large, noisy party. We can’t prepare for EVERY distraction, but try asking your maitre d’ for a quiet table when you make your reservation. (Of COURSE you are going to make a reservation!)
NEVER Pay for a Business Lunch with CASH!
One of my guests asked, “What if your client wants to pay for lunch?” I went into great detail in my book on how to avoid that situation by slipping your credit card to your server the moment you are seated. Not only does that help to avoid the fight over the check, but it also identifies YOU as the host of that party. This is an especially helpful tip for women when taking men to lunch. In many restaurants, servers still tend to give the check to the man. Ladies – take note! And you definitely want to pay for lunch with a credit card. Paying with cash can create a sort of “Let’s all chip in” or “Can I get the tip” atmosphere.
Alcohol … excessive alcohol, that is, … is the #1 cause of distress at business lunches! People have too much to drink or they are simply drinking a little on an empty stomach. Either way, they get drunk and it’s not long before their behavior gets sloppy. Chris said he brought a sales executive with him to a client lunch. The executive had too much to drink – and Chris ended up having the VP of his company call the client to apologize. I believe there is no quicker way to LOSE YOUR JOB than by getting drunk in front of clients. TAKE IT EASY!
It’s not a sin to eat a little something before you go. And – if you are attending a mixer at 5PM and lunch was at noon, you WILL BE drinking on an empty stomach. Park yourself by the food table when you first arrive. Remedy the situation. THEN, you’ll be free to mix and mingle with a drink in your hand without ending up on the floor! Besides, it’s impossible to eat, drink, AND hand out business cards! I keep a bag of nuts in my car, just in case I get hungry in the middle of the day or for any other time I’m not able to grab a quick bite.
How can you stop someone from drinking too much? This is a bit touchy, but it’s a great chance to collaborate with your server. Excuse yourself to the restroom, find your server, and tell them to CUT OFF the supply of alcohol to your client! Let them be the bad guy. They can also cut someone’s drink enough to render it fairly harmless. If you suspect your client may be on their way to getting drunk, order appetizers and get your server involved. Have them weaken the drinks so you’ll have the chance to get your client to eat. And NEXT TIME, invite that client out to breakfast. It will be a lot easier for them to stop drinking if they never get started.
Lastly, if you slip and fall, injuring only your pride, just stand up, brush yourself off, and carry on! I always ask if ANYONE in the room has NEVER spilled a drink. I’ve yet to see a hand go up. We are human, floors are slippery. Don’t wear shoes you can’t walk in – THAT should help slightly. Then, watch your step. I’m not saying you’ll never fall again, but being prepared WILL help!
I want to send out special thanks to everyone that I got to meet in OC. I’m here for you if any other questions come to mind. And if YOU have a situation for which you would like to have my opinion or my advice, just ask!
The KEEPER of the KEYS: Pre-production Begins!
I’m excited to announce that pre-production has begun on “The KEEPER of the KEYS” – a personal development movie starring Jack Canfield and Marci Shimoff. This movie will empower viewers by introducing them to the Universal Laws and by sharing how they can make these laws – or “KEYS” work to positively transform their own lives. Here is the first movie trailer to give you an idea about what the movie will deliver:
I am delighted to have put together an incredible cast of experts in the field of personal development. As Producer of this extraordinary movie, I am living proof that these laws are always at work in our lives.
Jack Canfield and Marci Shimoff were two of the stand-out experts in the phenomenally successful personal development movie, “The Secret.” That was the first movie in the self-help genre that enjoyed the sort of exposure usually reserved for blockbusters like “Avatar” or “The Blind Side.” It brought the field of personal development to millions who never knew about self-improvement.
My roles in this production include producer, screenwriter, and featured expert. As someone who grew up aware that we can continue to educate ourselves on the ways of the universe, I feel I am uniquely qualified to bring a powerful message to the masses. My father raised my siblings and me by making us listen to personal development RECORDS (long before there were tapes, CDs, or the Internet!) Whenever my sister and I would get into a fight, he would sit us down in front of his big “hi-fi” stereo and play Earl Nightingale’s “Lead the Field.” It’s actually quite a productive means of discipline! We learned early on that “Good attitude = good results; Bad attitude = bad results.” What other 12-year old kids get exposed to that sort of knowledge?
Now, working with incredible experts on my own production, in association with the Las Vegas Convention Speakers Bureau, my life is exceeding my own, incredibly high expectations! It’s true: What the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve. I am living proof that we can do whatever we set our minds to. Focused attention, intention, and the Law of Attraction are all brilliantly evident in my life – and I am humbled by this experience. Stay tuned for more updates!
Dr. Lisa Mauro – A VERY Special Veterinarian
The BEST Pet Care in Las Vegas is Dr. Lisa Mauro at HAVEN ANIMAL HOSPITAL
Whenever I speak on building relationships, I always stress the importance of making others feel special – and today it’s MY turn to give Dr. Lisa Mauro, the owner of Haven Animal Hospital, my most heartfelt gratitude and appreciation.
Those who know me know that my 11-year old Shih Tzu Georgie means the world to me. For those of us whose dogs are our “children,” seeing them in pain or distress is indescribable – even for someone like me, a writer. We need to know that the care we are giving them is the best available anywhere.
Georgie Chillin' in Her Stroller
Georgie is the most beautiful dog I’ve ever seen. Seriously, she stops traffic. People ooh and ahh when they see her. Of course, being such a diva, she takes it all in as if she was Angelina Jolie on the red carpet. She is light beige with the most amazing, long black eyelashes.
People stop us on the street to ask how I glue on her eyelashes. (Can you imagine a dog owner doing that?! I can’t!) When I tell them she is a natural beauty and those are real, they can’t believe it. I smooth her hair and lashes back so they can see that they are, indeed, natural. Often, they ask if they can snap her photo. She is my pride and joy and my little comedienne and she fills my days with love and light.
Today, Georgie went in for surgery to have a lump removed from her back leg. I thought it was a cyst, the kind she’s had before, but it soon became apparent that this one was different. It was wicked and was growing very rapidly. I knew we had to have it removed, but surgery on a dog who is 11.5 years old is never something to take lightly.
I Was So Happy to Celebrate the Opening of Haven Animal Hospital with Dr. Lisa Mauro
Dr. Mauro took exceptional care of my precious little girl. She opened Haven Animal Hospital last year because she wanted to create a facility where she could care for pets in the best possible way – and as a 36-year resident of Las Vegas, I can swear that I’ve never seen a facility as extraordinary as this or a doctor who is SO CARING. “Haven” is the perfect name.
And, you know that if I trust Dr. Mauro with Georgie’s life, she’s got to be amazing! The hospital is a state-of-the-art facility and Dr. Mauro treats all her patients as if they were her own.
I’m delighted to share that Georgie is sleeping soundly right now. She had a traumatic day and she’s exhausted. But she’s home, she’s on the mend, and I have Dr. Lisa to thank. I’ve never experienced this level of care before at any animal hospital in Las Vegas. If you love your pets like children, and you want to know where to take them for outstanding health care, take them to Dr. Lisa Mauro at Haven Animal Hospital. The phone number there is 702-260-6260 – and they are at Robindale and Rainbow, which is easily accessible from nearly anywhere in Las Vegas.
PCMA Convention Notes
PCMA convention attendees – and anyone else who wants to view this fantastic report – just click the link here to open the FORBES Insights report on doing business face-to-face.
I predict that meetings will soon become hybrids – a combination of face-to-face meetings with the key decision makers on site and additional attendees as a virtual audience. As indicated in the Forbes insight report, cost and time are the main reasons for hosting technology-assisted meetings. But the bottom line is that there is no substitute for a face-to-face meeting or – even better – the opportunity to break bread with your clients.
Cheers! I look forward to building a relationship with you. Please subscribe to my blog or sign up on my home page to receive my “7 Steps to Networking Success” – a wonderful, 7-part report that will have you saying, “I never thought of that!” ~ Robin
How Come I Don’t Weigh 300 Pounds?
There is a Conspiracy to Make Americans Fat
Whenever I speak to a group as “The Queen of the Business Lunch” and share that I have personally hosted more than 3,000 client lunches, I invariably get asked, “Robin Jay, how come you don’t weigh 300 pounds?!” I try to get a laugh with my answer: “Because I order the FISH!” It works; my audience members shake their heads knowing that ordering fish is a healthy choice. But the truth goes much, much deeper than that.
When I was busy racking up those 3,000 meals, I was also racking up time at the gym. In fact, at one point, I actually had three gym memberships AND worked out with a trainer at his facility! Whenever my lunch date would cancel, I would pop into the nearest of those four locations and get in a workout. Plus, I have a full gym at home. As my dad always says, “Calories in minus calories burned equals weight gained or lost.” There is no magic formula. But THAT is boring as hell, right? Want to hear something you probably HAVEN’T heard before?
What if I told you that there is a conspiracy that is working to pack pounds on you, your family, and your friends? In fact, ALL AMERICANS are at risk of becoming obese! And, believing that knowledge is power, I’m here to EMPOWER you.
I was recently enjoying a low-carb meal with my friend Andrew Klebanow. The information he shared with me was so startling, I knew I HAD to share it here with you – my faithful blog readers!
Andrew is Principal of Gaming Market Advisors
I’ve known Andrew for more than 20 years; as a former client when I sold advertising to the Las Vegas tourism & gaming industry, he accounted for a few of those 3,000 client lunches I hosted. Today, Andrew is a Principal of Gaming Market Advisors and is one of the foremost authorities on the gaming industry. He is a regular speaker at gaming expos and his expertise in the industry is outstanding, as is evidenced by his company’s IMPRESSIVE client list. Andrew’s research on behalf of his gaming clients has led him to some incredible discoveries about our FOOD INDUSTRIES!
Andrew is often called upon to deal with the opposition that arises when casino owners plan future developments. Any public debate on the pros and cons of casino development brings up the topic of problem gambling and its economic and social costs on the host community. (Bear with me – we’re getting to the FAT in just a sec; this is as exciting as a novel – you’ll see!)
These debates are frequently led by those who are morally opposed to casino gambling. It is Andrew’s task to clarify what problem gambling is, explore its prevalence in society, and compare its social and economic costs to other forms of aberrant behavior caused by what many see as more benign industries. Are you STARTING to see the connection? (NOTE: If you’d like an in-depth definition of what defines a “problem gambler,” just let me know and I’ll forward it to you.)
In 1999, the U. S. National Gambling Impact Study Commission (NGISC) reported that the percentage of U.S. adults classified as pathological gamblers is about 1.4%. Even as gaming development has grown considerably, the rate of problem gambling has remained fairly constant. The NGISC also reported that pathological gambling often occurs in conjunction with other behavioral problems, including substance abuse and personality disorders. The gaming industry has and continues to support initiatives that educate and treat problem gambling. (Just walk through any casino and you’ll see information regarding problem gambling posted everywhere!)
Other industries, however, have been far slower to embrace the costs that their products and services impose upon society yet, communities rarely raise a sign of protest against them.
In August of 2010, the U.S. Center for Disease Control issued a report stating that 27% of the U.S. population (72.5 million Americans) are now classified as obese. Unlike problem gambling, where the costs on society are hard to measure, obesity has some very real and significant costs.
Obesity Costs America Billions Each Year
On average, an obese person incurs $1,400 more a year in medical costs than a person of normal weight. The U.S. Center for Disease Control report estimates the costs to U.S. society at $147 billion a year. And unlike problem gambling, whose physical effects are for the most part, unknown, obesity is known to lead to heart disease, stroke, diabetes, cancer and premature death.
CONSPIRACY? Unless you are aware of what is in EVERYTHING you put in your mouth, you are doomed to a life of obesity, constantly battling your weight. I LOVE eating out – and prefer restaurants that offer fresh fish (and I’m not kidding now!) as well as lean, grilled steaks, big salads, and even cocktails and wine. I have plowed my way through 1.5 pounds of crab legs with a filet on the side in a single sitting! I have a hearty appetite, but I am extremely careful about what I eat and am aware of hidden salt, fat, and sugar – the “trilogy of triple bypass”! These three ingredients are often disguised and hidden in seemingly DELICIOUS, healthy food – from tender chicken to glazed veggies, as well as the more obvious desserts or fried foods.
U.S. agricultural policy subsidizes the production of corn, soybean and other commodities that are the raw ingredients of many foods linked to obesity. Cattle and hogs are fed feed made from corn. High-fructose corn syrup (HFCS) is the primary sweetener in soft drinks. Due to the public’s growing awareness of the dangers of HFCS, the Corn Refiners Association has decided to change the name of HFCS to “Corn Sugar“! Golly Gee – THAT sure sounds like a healthier choice! Along with Corn Sugar, a myriad of other products are produced from raw agricultural ingredients whose production is subsidized by taxpayers.
Do kids today even stand a CHANCE of growing up healthy?
Agricultural subsidies have the net effect of reducing the costs of food production and allowing food manufacturers, restaurant companies, and fast food chains to increase portion size while reducing food costs. Any attempt to reduce these subsidies to U.S. farmers is summarily blocked by politicians from agriculture states and lobbyists who represent agricultural interests.
Recognizing the obesity epidemic, both the U.S. federal government and state governments have explored a number of initiatives to limit consumption, including
instituting a tax on sugary soft drinks. Rather than address its role in combating the obesity epidemic, the soft drink industry has opposed any such measures at every level of government. The American Beverage Association, an industry lobbying group, characterized the tax as a “money grab” and has advocated that a tax on sugary soft drinks would affect low income consumers the most. So far, their efforts have succeeded in preventing governments from imposing such a tax.
The U.S. restaurant industry has likewise refused to take steps that might limit consumption. It has opposed posting calorie counts on menus or taking any other measure that might inform consumers of the hazards associated with their products.THIS IS WHY IT’S CRITICAL THAT YOU BECOME YOUR OWN HEALTH ADVOCATE! NO ONE, NOT THE GOVERNMENT OR THE GROWERS OR THE FOOD PRODUCT MANUFACTURERS ARE GOING TO HELP YOU! Discover all you can about nutrition and the food you are consuming – PLEASE! I want you to be around for a long time and enjoy a healthy life.
Instead of warning you of any food/health hazards, restaurant companies continue to develop recipes that encourage increased consumption of calories. They employ food chemists, test kitchens and market researchers to develop products that consumers want and crave, regardless what consumption of those products will have on their customers’ health and society as a whole. Restaurant companies and food manufacturers have essentially adopted strategies developed by the tobacco industry, which is to deny their responsibility to the epidemic and oppose policies that would limit or tax consumption.
Smoking & Obesity - KNOWN Health Risks!
(It is common knowledge now that for over a half century, U.S. tobacco companies denied that their products were unhealthy – and even funded scientific studies to support their claims. Only in the face of overwhelming scientific evidence have tobacco companies modified those strategies. Nevertheless, tobacco companies continue to lobby against initiatives, such as bans on indoor smoking that would restrict exposure to second-hand smoke. Today roughly 20% of adults smoke and their costs, both social and economic, are a significant burden on society.)
Remember that Andrew, who armed me with all this data about tax breaks and subsidies, was never out to indict the food or tobacco industries … and neither am I. My goal in sharing this information with you is to make you aware that unless you are eating barely processed, fresh ingredients, you are taking a risk with your health.
Andrew’s argument is sealed when he offers the following numbers that put problem gambling in perspective:
- 1.4% (the percent of adults who are problem gamblers),
- 27%(the percent of adults who are obese), and
- 20%(the percent of adults who smoke).
Problem gambling is real and the casino industry acknowledges it, but its impact on society and on the lives of Americans is relatively small when compared to obesity and tobacco use.
As we approach a new year and our traditional New Year’s resolutions, I hope you will resolve to become more educated about what you are eating and make choices that will lead you to a healthier lifestyle, one that includes exercise. Take care of yourself so that you will live a long time and enjoy an outstanding quality of life.