Building Relationships Can Help You Achieve Your Dreams
I got to be "The Keeper of the Keys" - The KEYS symbolize the Universal Laws
As a Business Relationship Expert, I have been able to accomplish so much more than I ever dreamed possible. As I move toward the December 8th premiere of “The Keeper of the Keys” – a personal development movie I’m producing – I am amazed at the important role that my business relationships have played in the success and execution of this production.
I put myself in a position to help others. Once you are able to build a reputation for being a “go-to” person, your friends and colleagues will come to you for everything. You will end up getting connected with extremely important people. Keep in mind, however, that your intentions must be pure! The benefit of building great relationships by helping others should never be about ultimately helping yourself … but that IS what is going to happen.
If you aren’t where you want to be, or where you THOUGHT you might be by now, ask yourself: “What can I do for others? How can I help THEM to achieve THEIR goals?” I assure you, it won’t be long before people want to help you in return. Reciprocity makes the world go ’round.
My goal for this movie was to help as many people as possible by showing them how to accept greater responsibility for their lives so they could stop feeling victimized by society, the economy, or even the government. To keep them engaged long enough to enjoy this personal development film, I had to find a way to “take the ‘hell’ out of self-help”!
Robin Jay with Jack Canfield on the set of her movie, "The Keeper of the Keys"
From the very first moment when I CONCEIVED the idea to produce a personal development movie, I wanted Jack Canfield as the STAR. Because I have worked with him before, included him in my anthology series, “The Power of the Platform”, and have worked hard to get him speaking engagements, he said he would love to be featured in my movie! He knows the caliber of work I produce and knows that I will feature him in a great light. As for Jack’s opinion when I told him that my movie is going to raise the bar on the entire self-help genre by being the first FUNNY, REAL-LIFE movie, he said, “Sounds like fun!” What a gracious man. I adore Jack. It’s true: the bigger they are, the kinder they are. Everyone who knows Jack loves him.
Director Scott Cervine, Marci Shimoff, & Robin Jay in the studio to film Marci's segment in "The Keeper of the Keys"
And, speaking of LOVE, my second choice for a star in the movie was Marci Shimoff, whose book “Love for No Reason” made it to the top of many best-seller lists earlier this year. Marci had contributed a chapter to my anthology series and helped me out. I wanted to help her by putting her in what I knew would be an amazing movie. She agreed.
Guess what Marci did for me then? She asked me if I would like her to invite her friend, John Gray, to be in the movie, too! John Gray – who has sold more than 50 Million copies of “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus” - is now in my movie. Friends like to help friends. And, I am thrilled to share that he HIT IT OUTTA THE PARK! His explanation of why men and women have trouble understanding each other is pure gold! And now, he shares this wisdom in MY MOVIE! Think I’m excited about THAT?! You betcha! Thanks, Marci!
Think about all the dreams you have … and every lofty goal you’d like to accomplish in this lifetime. I can assure you that doing all you can to help others will come back to you WITH INTEREST. Jack Canfield says we should all learn the 3-letter word that can move mountains: “ASK”! I learned to ask, and I agree with Jack that asking can deliver tremendous results. But, when you remember to ask what YOU can do for OTHERS, that is when you’ll really see your business increase and your life will become more fulfilling than you ever imagined.
How Much Love Can You Share?
I’m fortunate to work in the field of personal development because I can get away with spreading love, joy, and positive messages without raising too many eyebrows. Even if others don’t EXPECT me to be a bit “over the top” … they certainly aren’t surprised when they get to experience a little unexpected “love” or appreciation.
Does LOVE have a place in business?
By sharing the love, I simply mean spreading positive energy – whether that means signing an email with “Love, Robin” or “I love how you’re wearing your hair,” or “I love when we get to meet for lunch!”
Is it appropriate to sign an email, “Much love”? Definitely, if you are writing to friends. But what about when you are writing to a business associate, client, or coworker? What is too much? Can you share the joy and let people know just how much you care about them – even if your relationship is relatively new? And, if you’re dealing with someone you DON’T like as much, can sharing some love help to soften their edges?
I think the answer lies in your own comfort zone. Ask yourself how YOU would feel if someone signed an email to you the same way YOU want to sign YOUR emails. In dealing with the EXPERTS who are going to appear in the movie I’m producing, “The Keeper of the Keys,” I often sign my emails with “Much love” or “Sending Love Your Way.”
My friend Julie Neil used to sign all her e-mails (from work) “Hugs, Julie”. Guess what? Whenever I saw her, I got a hug. I knew when she signed her e-mails “Hugs” – she meant it! I ran into her recently at Trader Joe’s and – you guessed it – I got a great hug. Love you, Julie. And I loved all those sweet hugs – even when we were negotiating dollars and advertising schedules. Julie was a master at spreading and sharing the LOVE!
I admit I am MUCH MORE reserved with new, conservative relationships. But it usually doesn’t take long before I’m sharing and caring. Once I feel comfortable, and I believe you will appreciate it, I’ll send some love your way. As Jackie DeShannon sang, “What the world needs now is love, sweet love. It’s the only thing that there’s just too little of.”
Even if you have to be a bit more formal or reserved, you can still share love and joy as you go about your day. Offer compliments instead of criticisms. Offer a helping hand instead of complaining. Smile. Give hugs or hearty handshakes. And be sure to tell people just how much you appreciate them. You never know how long they will be here.
NOTE: I lost a friend yesterday – Randy Fleitz. His death from a heart attack was unexpected; he ran on the treadmill regularly and stayed in shape. We golfed together a few times – in charity tournaments and for business. He was hilarious. I can picture him on the links and can remember most of his funny comments.
Randy was my client, first at the Golden Nugget, then later at the Mirage. By the time we’d done a promotional ad campaign, we were friends. A round of golf cemented that. After I retired from selling advertising, I would see him occasionally around town.
Randy was younger than I. He had a family. I always knew him to be a VERY hard-working professional. And he was KIND – a fairly RARE quality among high-pressured casino executives. I remember about 15 years ago (or was it more like 18?), my step-brother James was visiting from Ohio. We sat at CPK/Mirage having lunch. Randy happened to come by. After introducing him to James, we spoke for a bit and then he went about his business.
James ate his lunch while he watched Agassi play tennis. He was mesmerized by the wide assortment of sporting events that filled the monitors in the sports book a few feet away. James said, “There is NOTHING like this in Cleveland!” (a line I often shared with my clients; we needed to remember how our fabulous strip is seen in the eyes of our visitors!) But that paled in comparison to how impressed he was when we discovered our lunch had been comped. James thought his big sister was really a big cheese, since I was friends with a boss at the Mirage. 
Randy, I’ll never forget that kindness.
I hope you have a tee time with your dad this week, and I hope you play well. You will be dearly missed by many here. Much love to you Randy, much love.
The KEEPER of the KEYS: Pre-production Begins!
I’m excited to announce that pre-production has begun on “The KEEPER of the KEYS” – a personal development movie starring Jack Canfield and Marci Shimoff. This movie will empower viewers by introducing them to the Universal Laws and by sharing how they can make these laws – or “KEYS” work to positively transform their own lives. Here is the first movie trailer to give you an idea about what the movie will deliver:
I am delighted to have put together an incredible cast of experts in the field of personal development. As Producer of this extraordinary movie, I am living proof that these laws are always at work in our lives.
Jack Canfield and Marci Shimoff were two of the stand-out experts in the phenomenally successful personal development movie, “The Secret.” That was the first movie in the self-help genre that enjoyed the sort of exposure usually reserved for blockbusters like “Avatar” or “The Blind Side.” It brought the field of personal development to millions who never knew about self-improvement.
My roles in this production include producer, screenwriter, and featured expert. As someone who grew up aware that we can continue to educate ourselves on the ways of the universe, I feel I am uniquely qualified to bring a powerful message to the masses. My father raised my siblings and me by making us listen to personal development RECORDS (long before there were tapes, CDs, or the Internet!) Whenever my sister and I would get into a fight, he would sit us down in front of his big “hi-fi” stereo and play Earl Nightingale’s “Lead the Field.” It’s actually quite a productive means of discipline! We learned early on that “Good attitude = good results; Bad attitude = bad results.” What other 12-year old kids get exposed to that sort of knowledge?
Now, working with incredible experts on my own production, in association with the Las Vegas Convention Speakers Bureau, my life is exceeding my own, incredibly high expectations! It’s true: What the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve. I am living proof that we can do whatever we set our minds to. Focused attention, intention, and the Law of Attraction are all brilliantly evident in my life – and I am humbled by this experience. Stay tuned for more updates!
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Etiquette FUN for Client Lunches OR Dinner with Friends
Louise and Barry Berlin share a laugh with me at a big restaurant opening recently.
I had a few friends over for dinner last night, including my friends Barry and Louise Berlin. Louise asked if it is okay to use your bread as a “pusher” – as in using it to push the salad onto your fork.
She was surprised when I ran to my bookshelf to retrieve my copy of “Etiquette for Dummies.” I explained that I went to a source because while I was quite certain I knew the answer, I really wanted to be sure … and when it comes to this particular question, I remembered that there are actually several different answers! That’s the thing about etiquette – different behaviors apply to different situations. MOST of these variations are simply based on the differences between formal and casual settings; bread as a pusher is no exception!
I was able to share with Louise and another friend, Edy, that in a CASUAL setting, it’s okay to use your bread as a PUSHER! BUT – in a more formal setting, it is not. No wonder I couldn’t remember!
Pick up a copy and be sure you're on the right track!
It’s funny to me that many people are often too intimidated to dine with me. I try to put them at ease by explaining that I was only able to write my book, “The Art of the Business Lunch” because I had already made every mistake there is to make; why not learn from my experiences? Why must we make every mistake ourselves? But I do know a lot when it comes to etiquette … I even speak on it!
So, where does the FUN come in? We started reading all about bread at the dinner table – how to pass it (to the right), how to take a slice (using the napkin to hold the loaf while you tear off a slice), and how you must put butter on your dish and then butter your bread; never take butter directly from the community plate and put it on your bread.
I think it’s fascinating to read about etiquette and discover all the little nuances that add grace to a client lunch or business dinner. If you’ve ever wondered about exactly what to do, pick up a copy of an etiquette book. You’ll really find it enjoyable and some of the tips are sure to surprise you!