I just had to share. I spoke recently for HP in Southern California, to a wonderful group of their printer resellers and partners. One of the guests was really inspired. Really. Working with Cristine McMillan at NetQuest and Eileen Angel with HP was a great experience. They encourage a fun, creative environment. And, they do a LOT to build solid relationships with their HP partners. Their guests enjoyed a fabulous lunch at Fleming’s during my presentation.

Carol decorated her cubicle with a business lunch fit for even the oldest executives!

I was so grateful when they forwarded these photos of Carol McAloney, an HP IPG Champion, who took my message to heart this Halloween. I guess there is NEVER a bad time for a great business lunch! I was only upset that as the QUEEN of the Business Lunch, I didn’t think of this first! Great job, Carol – I will remember this forever.

Check out the photos closely and you’ll see this happy couple is dining on roasted cockroach, finger-ling potatoes, (made with real fingers!), blood red wine, and the table is adorned with black roses. Of course, my book – “The Art of the Business Lunch, Building Relationships Between 12 and 2″ – is handy in case the mr. or ms. need to quick-check their etiquette!

It’s incredible that several people to whom I showed this photograph said, “I think I’ve eaten in that restaurant….the service is SO SLOW!” Hilarious. Here’s a close up of the fabulous business lunch for two.

Special thanks to Carol, Eileen, and Cristine. It’s a pleasure to work with such CREATIVE, imaginative, and fun professionals! Hope everyone had a Happy Halloween!

Ever felt like service was THIS slow?

A LOT Can Go Wrong at a Business Lunch: Being Prepared Will Help

As I wrote in my last post, I spoke recently for HP in Southern California. I was brought in to speak because my clients appreciate the importance of doing a business lunch the right way. Whether you’ve been on more than 3,000 client lunches (like I have) or you’re just starting out, it is important that you feel comfortable and confident. This can come from knowing what to avoid or how to handle certain situations.

During the meal, I asked the printer resellers and distributors to try to “Stump the Speaker / Shock the Speaker.” I wanted to offer my BEST advice for their WORST situations. I haven’t been stumped yet because most challenges or problems that come up at business lunches are more common than people think, but I definitely heard some great stories and thought-provoking questions.

I asked our guests 1) what was the worst thing that EVER happened to them at a business lunch, 2) how they might have better handled the situation, and 3) to share anything they might have trouble with – in general – along the way.

I found it interesting that most people offered their OWN suggestions as to how they might have better handled a particular situation. I think most of us tend to “hash & rehash” those awful moments in our minds. Seems we’d ALL like “a ticket to ‘shoulda, woulda, coulda.’” My mantra is “be prepared,” but things can happen fast when at a business lunch. If you’re with a big client, you might be nervous. And then, there are just a LOT of things that can go wrong. We’re people – not robots – and we have emotions, as well as million thoughts a day. Hindsight is always 20/20. Good judgment – unfortunately – comes from bad experience.

Here are some of the best stories from last week:

Shannon said that a client dumped coffee in his lap. HOT coffee. YIKES! As to what he would do differently? He would not have ordered coffee for the table! THAT was easy! And, I can add this little tip:

IF YOU KNOW that your client likes something you don’t care for – such as alcohol, dessert, or sushi, bring someone from your office as a “buffer.” That way, your client won’t have to drink alone (and YOU of course will be Designated Driver!), YOU won’t have to try to find cooked entrees at a sushi bar, or you won’t have to see your morning workout get annulled by a giant slice of cake you forced down just because your client wanted dessert! Bringing a coworker (or boss) can be a very wise move, especially when you know your client is going to want something you don’t care for.

One executive ended up in a restaurant that was too noisy. We’ve ALL been to restaurants that are USUALLY just fine for a business lunch, but on the day WE are there, there is a baby shower going on at the next table or some other type of large, noisy party. We can’t prepare for EVERY distraction, but try asking your maitre d’ for a quiet table when you make your reservation. (Of COURSE you are going to make a reservation!)

NEVER Pay for a Business Lunch with CASH!

One of my guests asked, “What if your client wants to pay for lunch?”  I went into great detail in my book on how to avoid that situation by slipping your credit card to your server the moment you are seated. Not only does that help to avoid the fight over the check, but it also identifies YOU as the host of that party. This is an especially helpful tip for women when taking men to lunch. In many restaurants, servers still tend to give the check to the man. Ladies – take note! And you definitely want to pay for lunch with a credit card. Paying with cash can create a sort of “Let’s all chip in” or “Can I get the tip” atmosphere.

Alcohol … excessive alcohol, that is, … is the #1 cause of distress at business lunches! People have too much to drink or they are simply drinking a little on an empty stomach. Either way, they get drunk and it’s not long before their behavior gets sloppy. Chris said he brought a sales executive with him to a client lunch. The executive had too much to drink – and Chris ended up having the VP of his company call the client to apologize. I believe there is no quicker way to LOSE YOUR JOB than by getting drunk in front of clients. TAKE IT EASY!

It’s not a sin to eat a little something before you go. And – if you are attending a mixer at 5PM and lunch was at noon, you WILL BE drinking on an empty stomach. Park yourself by the food table when you first arrive. Remedy the situation. THEN, you’ll be free to mix and mingle with a drink in your hand without ending up on the floor! Besides, it’s impossible to eat, drink, AND hand out business cards! I keep a bag of nuts in my car, just in case I get hungry in the middle of the day or for any other time I’m not able to grab a quick bite.

How can you stop someone from drinking too much?  This is a bit touchy, but it’s a great chance to collaborate with your server. Excuse yourself to the restroom, find your server, and tell them to CUT OFF the supply of alcohol to your client! Let them be the bad guy. They can also cut someone’s drink enough to render it fairly harmless. If you suspect your client may be on their way to getting drunk, order appetizers and get your server involved. Have them weaken the drinks so you’ll have the chance to get your client to eat. And NEXT TIME, invite that client out to breakfast. It will be a lot easier for them to stop drinking if they never get started.

Lastly, if you slip and fall, injuring only your pride, just stand up, brush yourself off, and carry on! I always ask if ANYONE in the room has NEVER spilled a drink. I’ve yet to see a hand go up. We are human, floors are slippery. Don’t wear shoes you can’t walk in – THAT should help slightly. Then, watch your step. I’m not saying you’ll never fall again, but being prepared WILL help!

I want to send out special thanks to everyone that I got to meet in OC. I’m here for you if any other questions come to mind. And if YOU have a situation for which you would like to have my opinion or my advice, just ask!

I got to speak to an outstanding group of professionals this week – printer resellers and distributors for HP. Since the program was for several hours and included lunch, I conceived an exercise to keep everyone engaged during the actual meal.

I passed out forms asking what was the WORST thing that had ever happened to them during a business lunch, how they might have been able to handle the situation better, and to add any other challenges they may have at networking or business events.

Since I’ve been speaking on “The Art of the Business Lunch” and building relationships for nearly 10 years now, and have YET to be stumped, I thought this would really be fun. The afternoon flew by, however, and I did not have the opportunity to go over the comments I received. Hence, I wanted to share the responses here … in a blog or two.

Here goes …

Never Draw Attention to Something Bad!

One of my favorite stories came from a rep walked into a restaurant with a client. About 15 minutes later, he pointed out a distracting couple that was making out at their table. Turned out to be his client’s husband and his mistress. When asked what he might have done differently, his only comment was that he should have asked this lady out after her divorce. Apparently, she’d “cleaned her husband’s clock” in the divorce. She got such a grand settlement, she quit her job and hasn’t worked since. I GUESS you could call that a happy ending?!

Another executive actually left his wallet at home. As for handling the situation better? He said he should have rescheduled his meeting for another day. I think that would have been a terrific solution – IF he wasn’t able to borrow $100 from a friend or swing by his house before lunch. BTW, I told him a story from my book about a sales rep who consistently “left his wallet at home” as a means of getting his clients to pick up the check. The buyers, who talk amongst each other, got wise and never fell for this again.

It's Easy to Get Away From a "Jerk" When at Networking Events

One of the professionals said he had a hard time acting interested in other peoples’ stories while at networking events. We’ve ALL been stuck in boring conversations and being prepared for casual conversation can certainly help us to steer a conversation in another direction. That being said, sometimes it is just best to excuse yourself. I’ve recommended to MANY people that they just say, “It’s been great seeing you here, but I need to work the room and mingle. Have a great evening.” Then, walk away and don’t look back!

I will share more stories in my next blog. In the meantime, let me assure you that walking into a room full of strangers is a stressful situation for MOST of us! Being prepared for casual conversation – by reading industry magazines and Web sites, being up to date on current events and pop culture, and knowing a little about a lot – will always help. Like a good scout, BE PREPARED! Asking questions of others – from “What did you do this past weekend?” to “Where is your favorite place to go on vacation?” can break the ice faster and more easily than you could ever imagine.

One final tip for this post: If you know your client likes to drink or eat something you don’t – from alcohol to coffee to raw oysters to dessert – bring a coworker with you. Usually, people just don’t want to indulge ALONE. As long as they have at least ONE “partner in crime,” your business lunch should flow incredibly smoothly.

Thanks again to all the attendees at the HP luncheon in Orange County. Your comments and input should keep me busy for quite a while! Thank you for taking the time to answer “Stump the Speaker; Shock the Speaker”!

I got to be "The Keeper of the Keys" - The KEYS symbolize the Universal Laws

As a Business Relationship Expert, I have been able to accomplish so much more than I ever dreamed possible. As I move toward the December 8th premiere of “The Keeper of the Keys” – a personal development movie I’m producing – I am amazed at the important role that my business relationships have played in the success and execution of this production.

I put myself in a position to help others. Once you are able to build a reputation for being a “go-to” person, your friends and colleagues will come to you for everything. You will end up getting connected with extremely important people. Keep in mind, however, that your intentions must be pure! The benefit of building great relationships by helping others should never be about ultimately helping yourself … but that IS what is going to happen.

If you aren’t where you want to be, or where you THOUGHT you might be by now, ask yourself: “What can I do for others? How can I help THEM to achieve THEIR goals?” I assure you, it won’t be long before people want to help you in return. Reciprocity makes the world go ’round.

My goal for this movie was to help as many people as possible by showing them how to accept greater responsibility for their lives so they could stop feeling victimized by society, the economy, or even the government. To keep them engaged long enough to enjoy this personal development film, I had to find a way to “take the ‘hell’ out of self-help”!

Robin Jay with Jack Canfield on the set of her movie, "The Keeper of the Keys"

From the very first moment when I CONCEIVED the idea to produce a personal development movie, I wanted Jack Canfield as the STAR. Because I have worked with him before, included him in my anthology series, “The Power of the Platform”, and have worked hard to get him speaking engagements, he said he would love to be featured in my movie! He knows the caliber of work I produce and knows that I will feature him in a great light. As for Jack’s opinion when I told him that my movie is going to raise the bar on the entire self-help genre by being the first FUNNY, REAL-LIFE movie, he said, “Sounds like fun!” What a gracious man. I adore Jack. It’s true: the bigger they are, the kinder they are. Everyone who knows Jack loves him.

Director Scott Cervine, Marci Shimoff, & Robin Jay in the studio to film Marci's segment in "The Keeper of the Keys"

And, speaking of LOVE, my second choice for a star in the movie was Marci Shimoff, whose book “Love for No Reason” made it to the top of many best-seller lists earlier this year. Marci had contributed a chapter to my anthology series and helped me out. I wanted to help her by putting her in what I knew would be an amazing movie. She agreed.

Guess what Marci did for me then? She asked me if I would like her to invite her friend, John Gray, to be in the movie, too! John Gray – who has sold more than 50 Million copies of “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus” - is now in my movie. Friends like to help friends. And, I am thrilled to share that he HIT IT OUTTA THE PARK! His explanation of why men and women have trouble understanding each other is pure gold! And now, he shares this wisdom in MY MOVIE! Think I’m excited about THAT?! You betcha! Thanks, Marci!

Think about all the dreams you have … and every lofty goal you’d like to accomplish in this lifetime. I can assure you that doing all you can to help others will come back to you WITH INTEREST. Jack Canfield says we should all learn the 3-letter word that can move mountains: “ASK”! I learned to ask, and I agree with Jack that asking can deliver tremendous results. But, when you remember to ask what YOU can do for OTHERS, that is when you’ll really see your business increase and your life will become more fulfilling than you ever imagined.

I’m fortunate to work in the field of personal development because I can get away with spreading love, joy, and positive messages without raising too many eyebrows. Even if others don’t EXPECT me to be a bit “over the top” … they certainly aren’t surprised when they get to experience a little unexpected “love” or appreciation.

Does LOVE have a place in business?

By sharing the love, I simply mean spreading positive energy – whether that means signing an email with “Love, Robin” or “I love how you’re wearing your hair,” or “I love when we get to meet for lunch!”

Is it appropriate to sign an email, “Much love”? Definitely, if you are writing to friends. But what about when you are writing to a business associate, client, or coworker? What is too much? Can you share the joy and let people know just how much you care about them – even if your relationship is relatively new? And, if you’re dealing with someone you DON’T like as much, can sharing some love help to soften their edges?

I think the answer lies in your own comfort zone. Ask yourself how YOU would feel if someone signed an email to you the same way YOU want to sign YOUR emails. In dealing with the EXPERTS who are going to appear in the movie I’m producing, “The Keeper of the Keys,” I often sign my emails with “Much love” or  “Sending Love Your Way.”

My friend Julie Neil used to sign all her e-mails (from work) “Hugs, Julie”. Guess what? Whenever I saw her, I got a hug. I knew when she signed her e-mails “Hugs” – she meant it! I ran into her recently at Trader Joe’s and – you guessed it – I got a great hug. Love you, Julie. And I loved all those sweet hugs – even when we were negotiating dollars and advertising schedules. Julie was a master at spreading and sharing the LOVE!

I admit I am MUCH MORE reserved with new, conservative relationships. But it usually doesn’t take long before I’m sharing and caring. Once I feel comfortable, and I believe you will appreciate it, I’ll send some love your way. As Jackie DeShannon sang, “What the world needs now is love, sweet love. It’s the only thing that there’s just too little of.”

Even if you have to be a bit more formal or reserved, you can still share love and joy as you go about your day. Offer compliments instead of criticisms. Offer a helping hand instead of complaining. Smile. Give hugs or hearty handshakes. And be sure to tell people just how much you appreciate them. You never know how long they will be here.

NOTE: I lost a friend yesterday – Randy Fleitz. His death from a heart attack was unexpected; he ran on the treadmill regularly and stayed in shape. We golfed together a few times – in charity tournaments and for business. He was hilarious. I can picture him on the links and can remember most of his funny comments.

Randy was my client, first at the Golden Nugget, then later at the Mirage. By the time we’d done a promotional ad campaign, we were friends. A round of golf cemented that. After I retired from selling advertising, I would see him occasionally around town.

Randy was younger than I. He had a family. I always knew him to be a VERY hard-working professional. And he was KIND – a fairly RARE quality among high-pressured casino executives. I remember about 15 years ago (or was it more like 18?), my step-brother James was visiting from Ohio. We sat at CPK/Mirage having lunch. Randy happened to come by. After introducing him to James, we spoke for a bit and then he went about his business.

James ate his lunch while he watched Agassi play tennis. He was mesmerized by the wide assortment of sporting events that filled the monitors in the sports book a few feet away. James said, “There is NOTHING like this in Cleveland!” (a line I often shared with my clients; we needed to remember how our fabulous strip is seen in the eyes of our visitors!) But that paled in comparison to how impressed he was when we discovered our lunch had been comped. James thought his big sister was really a big cheese, since I was friends with a boss at the Mirage. Randy, I’ll never forget that kindness.

I hope you have a tee time with your dad this week, and I hope you play well. You will be dearly missed by many here. Much love to you Randy, much love.

When it comes to marketing, the future is texting and “permission-based” advertising to attract new business and keep customers on site. Michael Perhaes, Sr. V.P. of Edelman Digital in Chicago, predicts that soon there will be no “traditional” or “digital” marketing, just “marketing.” He recently commented in the Las Vegas Sun on the state of – and various types of – hotel marketing. This combination of traditional and digital marketing, according to Perhaes, is being referred to already as “tradigital.”Inspiring, to say the least.

Reading Michael’s comment reminded me just how much I want to create my own word(s). This desire first came to me when Stephen Colbert invented the word “truthiness” a while ago. I decided I, too, wanted to invent a word. But where to begin….?

Hmmm. Being “The Queen of the Business Lunch,” I thought my word should probably have something to do with the Business Lunch. If I had a dollar for every time I had to type or say “Business Lunch,” I’d have more money than Trump. Don’t think I haven’t considered inventing “blunch.” It’s just that the word itself is, well, unappealing and unappetizing.  I’ve used “biz lunch” in the past, but it sounds too hurried, as in “Let’s catch a smoothie after a work out in the gym.”

I could rip of Colbert directly – and talk about “lunchiness.” But what exactly would “lunchiness” mean?

I finally decided upon a phrase, rather than a single word. I’m here to discuss my new phrase: “LUNCH WORTHY”! This works for me, as time today is our greatest resource. If you want me to meet you for lunch, I have to consider taking at least an hour to get ready (now that I work from home, I am not always “lunch ready”!) But that just scratches the surface.

There is the drive to wherever your office is or to the restaurant, if I am not going to pick you up. After SCHLEPPING back and forth across the valley for nearly 20 years, I am incredibly reluctant to drive very far just to have lunch with a colleague or client. Working from home has definitely spoiled me!

Then, there is the preparation. Preparing for a business lunch takes time. I have to get up-to-date on the industry, current events, and so on…. I’m sure you’re getting the picture.

The WORST part about lunch today is that since I’m now dressed up and out and about, I will most likely want to stop at the market on my way home. It’s apparent that a simple 1.5 hour lunch (or my favorite 2+ hour lunch) is going to turn into a 5-hour excursion. Taking 5 hours out of my day means I’ll be sitting here at 11PM, working and making up for lost time.

Are you LUNCH WORTHY? Is having lunch with you going to be so fabulous that it will be well WORTH the five hours it’s going to take? In many cases, it IS worth it. I love to connect with former colleagues and I definitely enjoy work-related business lunches with current clients or prospects. There are also worthwhile industry functions – which are tremendous networking opportunities!

The next time you take someone out to lunch, make sure you have a lot to share. Try to be as LUNCH WORTHY as possible and I bet you’ll see your lunch calendar fill up quickly!

And, if you still can’t spare the time it takes to have a productive, yet leisurely lunch, remember that a coffee or breakfast meeting can always solve your problems. Here is a clip where I explain why coffee is a great substitute for a business lunch.

Professional Convention Management Association Chapter Meeting, 10/7

Thursday morning, October 7th, I’ll be speaking at the Southwestern/Pacific chapter meeting of PCMA: Professional Convention Management Association. I’d like to send special thanks to Gina Mann at the Las Vegas Convention Vistors Authority for recommending me as this month’s speaker. The breakfast will be held at the South Point Hotel & Casino at 8AM.

I’ll be presenting “B FACE 2 FACE 4 SUCCESS” - a 60-minute keynote presentation on building EFFECTIVE & PRODUCTIVE business relationships that will include suggestions that you will be able to implement IMMEDIATELY to increase your sales and improve your bottom line. This presentation is built upon the lessons I discovered while building relationships during my sales career, which I shared in my first book, “The Art of the Business Lunch: Building Relationships Between 12 and 2.” My experience during nearly 20 years of sales and my ability to build such incredible relationships is why my clients started calling me “The Queen of the Business Lunch”.

A strong ability to build relationships can assure your success – whatever field you are in. WHY? Because PEOPLE PREFER TO DO BUSINESS WITH PEOPLE THEY LIKE! Your parents were wrong: success in life actually IS a popularity contest! After all – who wants to hang out with or do business with people they DON’T LIKE?! When you look at it this way, it makes sense: to succeed, you need to develop your PEOPLE SKILLS.

People have choices – and when it comes to business, they are even more likely to take advantage of their options … especially in THIS competitive environment. No business decision is ever JUST about price!

When I deliver this presentation, I ask my audiences for a show of hands to

The feedback I get when presenting supports my doctrine: PEOPLE PREFER TO DO BUSINESS WITH PEOPLE THEY LIKE!

indicate how many people REGULARLY go OUT OF THEIR WAY to patronize a particular business because they PREFER how they are treated at the more inconvenient location than at a similar business closer to their homes. I ALWAYS get 100% response! That supports my point: your people skills can improve your business or destroy it. It’s not that hard to build solid, productive business relationships. I’ll be sharing tips and techniques so that you, too, can become a Business Relationship Expert! Hope to see you there.

Executives PREFER Face-to-Face Meetings

FORBES Insights‘ latest report shows that executives prefer face-to-face meetings. Wow – As “The Queen of the Business Lunch,” I could not have put that better myself. The reasons why they preferred IN PERSON, face-to-face meetings? There is no comparison:

• To build STRONGER, more MEANINGFUL business relationships (85%)
• Ability to read body language and facial expressions (77%)
• More social interaction, ability to bond with co-workers/clients (75%)
• Allow for more complex strategic thinking (49%)
• Better environment for tough, timely decision-making (44%)

Complaints about technology-enabled meetings were that they often resulted in disruption and delays. The ONLY reasons anyone said they preferred technology-assisted meetings were bottom-line, such as saving time, money, or location flexibility.The choice is yours: STRONGER, MORE PRODUCTIVE business meetings or technical difficulties?

As a Business Relationship Expert, I discovered a long time ago that those relationships that were built over a business lunch, an outstanding networking event, or even a round of golf lasted forever. We bonded. Apparently, I’m not the only successful executive who knows that, although I may be the only one who wrote a book about building business relationships over lunch (“The Art of the Business Lunch: Building Relationships Between 12 and 2″).

A compromise can be reached, too, by holding smaller meetings with an assist from technology. But to build long-lasting, solid business relationships, seize some face time!

BTW, the Ritz-Carlton weighed in on the report to reach out to business travelers by offering “Meetings Within Reach,” a value-added opportunity for organizers of on-site seminars, executive retreats, and other corporate events. Their message is “It’s not extravagant IF it produces results.” I’d like to give special thanks to Bruce Himelstein, Ritz-Carlton’s senior vice president of sales & marketing. He acknowledged that technology can never replace the “traditional methods of dealing with people in person…” I rest my case … there is NO Substitute for QUALITY “Face time.”

Notice: I am currently seeking annual contracts with companies who would like to send me out to speak to their clients on the importance of quality face time and how to build productive business relationships. E-mail me to explore the possibilities.

Even a "Queen" needs a new logo once in a while!

I often get asked about my nickname, “The Queen of the Business Lunch.” It’s been years since I wrote the award-winning book “The Art of the Business Lunch: Building Relationships Between 12 and 2″ and even longer since I earned my nickname. I thought since I just got a new logo, I would take this opportunity to share some of my business lunch tips and business relationship expertise.

First, the nickname. It came about as a combination of many things. The nature of my business was such that I merely needed to stay in touch with many of my clients. Once I sold them, they were sold, so I didn’t need to do any more convincing. By the nature of my work, all I could do was take them out to lunch, build my relationships, keep them up-to-date on what was going on with my business and our industry, their industry, and so on. What better way to do this than over lunch?

I took great care of my clients, and since I had so many of them, I would book lunches weeks in advance. This of course meant that I, too, was booked weeks out. Friends in the business would call me to book lunch. “How about next Tuesday.” “Can’t…I’m booked already.” You can imagine how long it would take to find a “free” day!

It wasn’t unusual for me to be booked as much as three or four weeks out. And THAT is when the name calling started. My peers would tease me and say, “You don’t really work … You are just the Queen of the Business Lunch!” I took great offense at this, at first! I worked VERY hard. It’s never easy to make something LOOK easy. Of course my friend were just teasing. They knew how much business I was booking and that it didn’t happen by itself.

That is why I wrote “The Art of the Business Lunch.” I had hosted more than 3,000 client lunches (do that math – at a conservative 4x a week (considering business breakfasts, mixers, and lunches combined), times 52 weeks a year, times 18 years…) and I saw my sales increase by more than 2,000%! I knew I was on to something. I wanted to share my Business Relationship Expertise with business professionals everywhere.

Here are some quick tips:

• Always make a reservation.
• Don’t skip lunch; if you’re crunched for time, meet your clients for breakfast! You’ll save money, too.
• Prepare for casual conversation. Avoid awkward silence by knowing a little about a lot.
• Choose a restaurant with a great menu, lots of selections, and a medium price – unless it’s a special occasion.
• If you can wait, don’t bring up the subject of business until AFTER everyone has eaten. We tend to be more receptive to new ideas on a full stomach.

For more tips, click the RSS link to subscribe to my blog, or click the products menu button at www.RobinJay.com or Amazon.com to order “The Art of the Business Lunch.” Remember – how you behave while at a business lunch can MAKE or BREAK a deal! Don’t risk it – stack the deck in your favor by being prepared.

WHY is the Business Lunch SO IMPORTANT? Watch this quick video to discover the answer….

Use Caution When Sending a Big E-mail Blast!

Do you work with a DATABASE? I do – and in my attempt to UPDATE my newsletter list, I made a mistake that upset a LOT of people! Lauren Bloom, attorney, author, and speaker, wrote a book called “The Art of the Apology,” and I think I need her help!

As you may know, I have a wonderful, FREE, e-mail offer called “7 Steps to Networking Success” which I set up years ago at Robin Jay.com. If you sign up on my home page, you will receive the best of my networking tips that will support my status as a Business Relationship Expert! I get great feedback from it and I know it has helped a LOT of people!

Order Lauren Bloom's Book: The Art of the Apology - You never know when you might need to apologize!

Okay, Robin…cut to the chase! I imported 2500 names (from my list of about 3,000) to new database software. WHILE I was on the phone with the guy from the software company, he asked, “Is this campaign ready to go?” I said, “YES … but I need to modify the first page.” Can you believe that between the “YES …” and the “But” – he hit SEND!!!?!?

Needless to say, my “Welcome to my new newsletter” went out as “Thank you for signing up for my 7 Steps to Networking Success program!” Many people were upset – understandably – as they had NOT signed up for a new, 7-part email program!!!

Oh Lauren – I can’t take it back! Of course I sent customized notes to EVERYONE who was upset, sent them a FREE e-book, and apologized profusely. The LAST thing I EVER want to do is annoy people with unwanted e-mail! But the people on my list are ALL people who had given me their card! Either they have heard me speak, met me at an industry event, or somehow “opted in.” It’s been so long since I’ve been in touch, I can see why they might not remember me! They had been getting my newsletter (the last one went out in JANUARY!) I was just trying to switch over things to expedite my mailings. Ay-yi-yi!

It has become glaringly apparent that people are WAY TOO STRESSED! The feature I LOVED about my software is that it has a “double opt-in”system. If you receive something from me and you don’t want it, just do nothing. You won’t hear from me again UNLESS you click the link that says “OKAY!” But people did not read down far enough to see that. It also offers a huge UNSUBSCRIBE link at the bottom of every e-mail. I would think professionals would be savvy enough to know that! Instead, they took the time to send me ugly e- mails! (When all they HAD to do was NOTHING – simply nothing.) Wow – I’m so SORRY! My only crime is wanting to stay in touch and keep my contacts updated.

Apparently, many of us have have lost our sense of humor along with our tolerance. I URGE you – if you are so stressed that you are snapping at someone that you know – even vaguely – when they are TRYING to help you to become more proficient at networking – PLEASE take a break! Sip a latte, enjoy a night out, or have a massage!

I get so much e-mail I don’t want – and I hit the JUNK folder or the DELETE key. Life is really so much simpler than we make it! I apologize again! I hope you are enjoying your day. And, if you need to apologize to anyone for anything, tell Lauren I sent you.